


Roadtrips Are For Pussies, Luckily, We Have Dicks

by Ashkenna



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band), All Time Low
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - College/University, I Don't Even Know, I'm Sorry, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Road Trips, Sorry Not Sorry, just kidding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-30
Updated: 2014-11-30
Packaged: 2018-02-27 12:13:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2692553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashkenna/pseuds/Ashkenna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyday he'd get up, get dressed for school, and look in the mirror even if he already knew he would be dissatisfied with the sight he was met with.</p><p>Personally, Michael felt that he looked like someone was trying to make a love child between your cliche punk rocker and that one guy who ate little Debbie cakes 24/7 (who really wasn't anybody).</p><p> </p><p>~°~°~°~</p><p>In which Michael is a little over weight and in love with that guy from the coffee shop who he also happens to go on a small road trip with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Roadtrips Are For Pussies, Luckily, We Have Dicks

**Author's Note:**

> Title brought to you by my best friend Emily.
> 
> I'm not sorry.
> 
> Please forgive any mistakes, I'm still not used to writing on my phone
> 
> And this is probably the longest thing I've written.

"You look just fine, Michael, stop fretting." His parents would say. "There's nothing wrong with you."

"So what if your a little on the chubby side? Who the fuck cares?" His friends would say. "Its not like you're six hundred pounds."

"You're so adorable!" His favorite teacher used to coo, pinching his cheek.

"It runs in the family," his grandfather would grunt while his grandmother would rant about how Michael was just fine the way he was.

Well, Michael would beg to differ.

Well, except the thing about the six hundred pounds. He certainly wasn't like that. But sometimes it felt like it.

Everyday he'd get up, get dressed for school, and look in the mirror even if he already knew he would be dissatisfied with the sight he was met with.

Personally, Michael felt that he looked like someone was trying to make a love child between your cliche punk rocker and that one guy who ate little Debbie cakes 24/7 (who really wasn't anybody).

He was stretched out like taffy, but he had these awkward bumps and curves that didn't naturally belong there. And then there was his hair that was like a monstrosity, everywhere and always a different color- whether at the same time or not, and Michael wants to know the fuck why he wanted to make himself stand out more.

Most days Michael felt like the only good thing about him was his taste in music, and his sort of talent with singing. Some days, Michael wanted to know how the hell he even made it through high school.

But here he is, standing in the court yard of some big fancy college, students sprinkling here and there and Michael just couldn't. He felt so insecure, with all these girls and guys were giving him weird looks, judging his Blink-182 t-shirt, hair color, piercing, and the way he was kind of chubby. And so, he just decided he would find his dorm. He didn't email his roommate, he didn't need anything from him and he figured his roommate could fend for himself since he never bothered to email him either.

And when he got there, he concluded his roommate was a douche. Sports posters were hanging up everywhere and five of the guys belongings were already on Michael's side of the room. While the guy himself was nowhere to be found.

And it wasn't like Michael hated sports, he just wasn't... obsessed with them.

That was really how his first day at university was like.

His first week was even worse.

His roommate kept trying to get Michael to agree to throw parties but Michael wasn't having any of it. And so the guy went of to his friends and threw parties there instead, all the while glaring daggers at Michael through his hangovers in the morning when Michael would turn up his music really loud.

And he was pretty sure all of his professors were all judgemental bastards.

His next week was.

Considerably better.

Except for the fact that he got kicked out of his own dorm because douche number one had friends that were obnoxious. He ended up taking his laptop to the coffee shop off campus, but only a block away. He ordered a random latte and sat his chubby ass down to do some of his school work. Which was next to none, because whether people believe it or not, Michael isn't a terrible student.

And out of the corner of his eye, whilst watching random cat videos on YouTube, he caught sight of a guy around his age, black beanie, Sandy blond hair with brown roots and streaks, and a really nice smile. He was wearing a random Rolling Stones t-shirt and grey skinny jeans with a well-loved pair of black converse. He was smiling at the current barista and laughing, and before Michael knew it, the guy was behind the counter.

There was no way that guy could even be remotely gay, Michael told himself, much less be into him.

So he told himself he would watch from a distance. And he did. Quite a lot actually.

He would go in when he had left over homework, and just sat with his earphones in his ears and listen to whatever he felt like that day. Until the guy with a great smile came in.

The second time he saw him, the guy did the same thing, talking to the original barista and then he was behind the counter after going in the back of the coffee house for like, three minutes.

It was one of those slow days, where around four people trickled in every hour, and other than that, it was practically empty. Mr. Smile looked bored as he started to make coffee for an impatient business man, who glared at him when he started humming.

"Go any slower would you?"

"I could, yeah, might be a better option. Can't rush the art of coffee." That. Surprised Michael a little. He had an American accent.

The guy was red in the face when he was given his freshly brewed cup.

Michael hoped he burned his tongue. Or better yet, hoped it spilled all over him.

That actually might be a little harsh for a guy Michael didn't even know. Oh well.

Michael didn't go to the little coffee shop that sat on the end of the street for another three weeks after that.

When he finally did, it was five in the morning- on a Tuesday for students whom had to get up way early for six o'clock classes.

But Michael didn't have classes that day, really, the problem was that he had been up all night long and he couldn't sleep. Some asshole decided to steal his bag the other night, and literally got it back last night- only to find that all of his homework and notes had been utterly destroyed. He had spent all night- literally all night, not even a minute of sleep- fixing the damage.

He borrowed a sort of friend's notes, and man, he could not thank that guy enough. Thank God for Jack Barakat. But shit if he wasn't tired.

Normal people would be recovering in bed right now.

Michael decides he's not much of a normal person.

He stands in line behind some girl who apparently decided for herself it was okay to wear a shit ton of bright colors in the morning. She was talking on a purple phone loudly, and Michael just had to wonder if she was human. Because, who the he'll can possibly be this cheerful so early in the morning.

By the time he was standing up at the counter he was squinting so hard he couldn't see an inch in front of him. He was pretty sure if he opened his eyes again, he'd start hallucinating and see neon everywhere.

Michael heard a crumbly kind of laughter, and his first thought is that it reminded him of cookies that had just come out of the oven and fall apart in your mouth.

And he just compared someone's laughter to a food. Shit he really is hallucinating.

"Nice to see I wasn't the only one affected by that ray of sunshine over there," another cookie like laugh.

With out meaning to Michael says, "Is it safe to open my eyes all the way now?"

That earns him an earnest, loud, laugh. "Yeah. What can I get you?"

Michael opens his eyes to find Mr. Mother-Fucking-Gorgeous Smile standing in front of him and Michael's eyes widened, giving off the impression of saucers.

So much for watching from a distance.

He looked. Different up close. Michael didn't really feel disappointed, nor proud. He just kind of felt that this guy was way more real.

On a silver name tag pinned to the left strap of his apron written in black sharpie was Alex G.

Michael briefly wondered what the G stood for, and then remembered he had to order. His face burned in embarrassment, his nose scrunched up.

"Uh, can I get a Tripplo?"

"Woah, that's three shots of espresso there kid. Late night?" Michael sort of relaxed a bit, less widened eyes and more of a lazy smile Michael didn't really like at all, but it was either that or seem unemotional.

Michael grunted. "Sure, we'll put it that way."

Alex smiled a little, the corner of his mouth tilting up. "Anything else?"

"I s'pose a Brew would be nice too."

"Alrighty, one Tripplo and Brew coming up..."

Alex went on the tell Michael the cost of his order, Michael hardly paying attention, preferring to listen to the sound of his voice.

Once given his caffeine and tea, he sat down in his corner pulling out his laptop and Jack's notes; he had to finish transferring the last three pages still.

Michael spent the next three days going to class as usual, until he remembered that he still had Jack's notes and he had to take them back. But when he decided he'd bring them back, it was two in the morning.

Jack lived off campus with three others that Michael's never met. And of course, there would be the chance that Jack wouldn't be up at 2:16 AM, but it's more likely he would be. Cause hey. It's Jack.

Michael soon became pretty thankful that Jack lived considerably close to campus, because it was pitch black outside other than the occasional street lamp. Michael was convinced he was gonna get mugged.

So. The walk to grandma's isn't very fun when it feels like you've got a big bad wolf breathing down your neck.

Finally, Michael reached the pale house with green windows that was Jack's. The lights in the living room were on, the yellow light making the world outside a little more visible. Michael hoped it wasn't one of his roommates, considering he's only met Zack, and that was once.

Michael knocked on the door after walking through the yard and up the front steps. Michael counted to twenty before knocking again, although a bit louder.

Michael heard distant footsteps get noisier and the door in front of him opened

Only to reveal a shirtless Alex looking dozy. His eyes were droopy and his hand kept reaching up to rub his eye, as if his sleepiness would go away instantly.

"Hey," he spoke. "Three shots of espresso guy, right?" His voice was weary and deep and Michael had to look down to avoid looking at him.

"Uh, y-yeah," Michael said, twisting his hands. "Erm, could- Could you give these to Jack for me?"

Alex took the papers that Michael had handed over and laughed a bit. "Kid, what the hell are you doing at two in the morning giving back notes?"

And just as Michael was about to answer, he was cut off by Jack's voice shouting from the living room.

"Hey Alex, who is it?"

"Ah, one of your friends..." Alex trailed off and locked eyes with Michael, completely awake.

And then Michael realized his name was being asked. "M-Michael."

"-Michael, he's giving back your notes that were probably stolen from someone else." Alex laughed, turning to face the inside of the house, and Michael could help but stare at his back, from the shoulder blades, down to the end of his spine.

"Ah! Invite him in!" Alex turned back to Michael with a crooked smile.

"Come in?"

"Ah- um, I really shouldn- I mean it's not that I don't want to- I just. I have classes in the morning?"

Jacks face poked around from the door frame suddenly, with a slight frown on his face. "You're an awful liar."

"I don't think he likes us Jack," Alex said, turning to Jack- whose hair, by the way, was pointing in every direction possible- with a small pout.

"Aw, no Michael? I thought we were pretty chill, you know?"

"Besides," Alex continued, "You would totally be mugged walking back. You can just stay the night and that's it! Go back in, you know, five or six hours, or however early you get up."

"I. I just don't think that wou-"

"Not be a good idea?" Jack said, making Michael feel like he stuffing words into his mouth. "Fuck yeah it is! Now get your ass in here."

So this is what peer pressure feels like.

Except. You probably couldn't really call it peer pressure considering Michael wasn't good friends with them or anything

He wished.

But, yeah, he ended up staying the night and sleeping until noon.

He didn't really talk to either of them for a while after that.

Until he was getting coffee one morning and Alex was once again taking his order (except with out obnoxious teenage girl-like thirty year olds).

"Hi, what can I get for you?" Alex spoke, a small grin tilting his lips. "Hopefully not another Tripplo, right?"

"Yeah, um, no, just a Café Melange would be fine."

"Yes sir-" except Alex added an unnecessary 'Ee' to the end of sir. "You'll have your drink in just a minute."

And then Michael had to stand there awkwardly for three minutes until his steaming cup of coffee was handed to him.

And then Michael sat down at a corner table that sat in the back of the coffee shop.

Michael left before Alex got off his shift.

He didn't go back for a week or two.

Until Jack approached Michael and asked him about a road trip for winter break, saying he could invite a few friends too. Apparently their destination was someplace warmer, although no one really knew the destination.

Michael didn't say anything to that last part, considering his three best friends were all in different places. But, over all, he said he'd think about it.

They didn't speak again after that, Jack leaving with a wave and smile.

The subject didn't come of until Michael was leaving his class, and bumped into Alex who was actually going in.

Michael was a little surprised considering he's never actually seen Alex anywhere other than the coffee shop on the corner (and that one time at Jack's).

Alex stopped him from walking off by grabbing his shoulder.

"So, you're going on the road trip with us, right? Rian and Zack decided they would ditch us; they've got girlfriends."

"Uh, I'll think about it?"

Alex pouted at him. "But you've ben thinking about it for weeks! And break is in five days."

"If I go, will you promise not to ask me about another trip? Ever?" Michael sighed, looking up at Alex.

"I promise, I swear on my life."

And then Michael saw neither Jack nor Alex until the beginning of break.

That was a bad morning all in it's self.

When he woke up, he overslept, realizing  he didn't turn on his alarm, and it took him another ten minutes just to get up and get ready, and so by the time he was finished grabbing his bags, he was at least an hour late.

When he walked outside his dorm, he realized he was actually wearing his flannel pajama pants that made his hips look girly and big, but Michael could care less.

When he finally reached the parking lot, he found Jack and Alex sitting outside smoking and laughing their asses off

Michael immediately thought they were laughing at him, about him, But he quickly shooed any kind of negative thought away from his head.

Michael walked up to them, dropping his bag.

They barely looked up at him before he was apologizing.

"Sorry I over slept and it took me forever to change, even though I'm not completely- and just. Yeah. Sorry."

Alex grinned up at him, and Jack just laughed, so Michael assumed he wasn't in the wrong.

"We didn't get here until twenty minutes ago." Alex said, his voice all kinds of warm and deep.

And then Michael kind of ended up on the road with Jack and Alex. He slept until eleven at night, waking up to Jack and Alex screaming words to a song out their windows.

Michael sat up a little, watching Alex grin and laugh; Michael would have been content to just stay there watching.

Alex caught Michael's eyes and gave Michael a wide smile.

And oh.

Oh. Well, shit.

Michael thinks he might actually like Alex. So much for pining from a distance.

He should have known that that was just the beginning.

By the time they even reached a hotel it was three in the morning and they were all giggling at nothing and everything and Jack was the only one able to wake up enough to get a room.

Michael and Alex leaned on each other, looking around them and the green carpet and mahogany tables.

Alex giggled, and Michael laughed, not even knowing what at.

"What if. What if they had little fireflies for lights?" Alex chuckled, laying his head on Michael's shoulder.

"That, my good sir, would be awesome."

Jack came back with a room key and pushed then to the elevator. "We, my friends, are totally going to crash in a roach infested hotel now."

"Shhh!" Michael whispered, "They'll hear us!"

Jack laughed leading then into he elevator and pushing their floor button.

Michael woke up the next morning smoothered in between Jack and Alex. He felt his heart speed up and he inhaled, realizing his face was pressed into Alex's chest. He felt an odd tracing on his back, like someone was gently pressing patterns into him permanently. 

His breath caught in his throat when he realized it was Alex, whose arms were wrapped around him.

Jack's gigantic snore also gave it away.

So, instead of giving away his wake, Michael laid in a state of conflict.

If he were to wake up, the soothing sensation of Alex rubbing his back would end, but if he were to stay "asleep" he'd probably give himself away. 

Michael decided to slowly "wake up". He made a grunting noise and the hand on his back halted.

Proceeding his act, Michael pushed away from Alex and yawned, stretching his arms over his head. He turned his head in Alex's direction and blinked a couple of times.

Alex stared at him, and Michael stared back.

"We should get up, I'm pretty sure Jack's got something pressed against my back that I don't want to know about," Michael said, wrinkling his nose.

Alex rolled over on his back and snorted, a small grin twisting at his lips. "Hot."

And without saying anything else, Alex pushed himself up on his elbows and rolled out of bed. Michael followed suit, trying not to stare when he realized Alex was only wearing a t-shirt and boxers. 

Michael tugged on the hem of his shirt, all too aware of his pudgy stomach.

"It's a great thing this hotel has free breakfast." Alex muttered and put on a random pair of pajama bottoms.

They were halfway through there third set of plates and forth cups of coffee when they saw Jack stumble into the lobby, hair roughly pushed back from his face.

Laughing at Jack's distress, Alex handed him his coffee.

Jack downed it like alcohol, grimacing at the after taste. "Thanks," he said shortly and then went to grab himself a plate of his own food.

Michael watched the interaction with awe. He's pretty sure his friends would only laugh at his pain and shove him into the case of food on the counter top.

Before Micahael knew it they were on the road again, this time Alex driving while Michael rode shotgun and Jack snorted away in the back.

They sat quietly for a while, staring at the open road ahead, heat on full blast. "I spy, something... gray."

This startled a laugh out of Michael as he looked at Alex.

"The road."

Alex faked a surprised look and said, "holy shit how did you know?"

Michael grinned. "Lucky guess."

Their little game turned into Truth or Dare, which was really Truth or Truth, not like you can do much daring when one of the players are driving.

"Truth or Dare, Michael?" Alex asked with a cheeky grin, eyes still on the road.

"Oh Jesus I'm going to regret this." A pause. "How about dare?"

"I dare you to wake up Jack-"

"Simple enough," Michael sighed relieved, and turned towards the backseat. 

Alex's arm reached out to grab Michael's shoulder, and Michael looked back at him to see his grin widen. "Ah ah ah, Michael." Alex said, making a tsking noise. "You have to wake up Jack, by moaning in his ear."

Sometimes Michael wished he wasn't of the male gender, so he didn't go along with ridiculous things like this.

"Fine."

And Michael leaned over to the backseat and hovered over Jack. He swallowed the lump in his throat and tried to remember the sounds he made when he was blissed out.

He started out with small grunts and then little whines to full out moans.

Jack woke up with wide eyes and Michael couldn't help laughing. Jack shot him a glare and turned over, putting a hand over his ear, and went back to sleep.

Michael sat in his seat properly before glancing at Alex, whose cheeks looked red. Michael thought it must've been the heat so he turned it down a bit.

"What's next, Gaskarth? I can take anything you throw at me." Michael said with an over exaggerated wink.

Alex looked at him briefly with a small grin. "Alright. Would you rather have pepperoni for nipples or nippleroni pizza?"

"Pepperoni nipples. Is it an endless supply? Because I could just eat them and they'd come right back. Although. That might be a form of cannibalism."

Alex was laughing so hard he might of had tears in his eyes. "Yes, an endless supply of pepperoni for nipples just for you, Mike. Everyone else would have a limited supply."

Michael grinned and punched the air with a small, "Yes!"

This is how the rest of their ride went.

Jack woke up in the middle of their game, without their help, and joined in.

"We are going to drop the car off at a hotel, check in, call a cab, go to a club, and get wasted." Jack declared.

They proceeded to do just that. They were all sitting at the bar (Michael deciding to get a Bloody Mary was a bad idea, he is properly smashed now) when a petite blond walked up to Jack and started purring things at him, rubbing his arm.

Alex leaned over and whispered in Michael's ear: "Looks like we'll have the hotel to ourselves then."

Michael staggered, and even in his drunken state, tried to ignore the fluttering of Alex's breath on his ear gave his heart.

Soon enough, Jack was stumbling out the door, the blond attached to his arm still murmuring to him.

Michael turned to look at Alex to find him already looking back at him.

They drank a couple drinks more and called another cab to take them back to the hotel.

His memory became fuzzy then, they were talking during the car ride and then suddenly they were in the hotel room, Alex trailing kisses down Michael's neck while Michael was clawing into Alex's hips under his shirt.

Michael remembers sloppy kisses and Alex tugging his own shirt off and then being embarrassed about his own skin until Alex soothed him out of his long-sleeved shirt.

And then they were in bed rutting against each other like a pair of teenagers. And then their pants were off and Alex was arching above him all skin and pants and sweat and moans.

Michael remembers biting into Alex, where his neck met his shoulder while Alex rocked into him slow and sweet.

Then Michael woke up, sore in the best of ways, and alone in a hotel bed.

Michael sank into the bed with shame, realizing how naked he was.

He should have known better.

Michael pulled himself up and grabbed a change of clothes and went to the bathroom, locking the door behind him.

He turned the knob of the shower and wwaited for it to warm while he looked in the mirror.

Of course Alex wouldn't actually want him, with a body like his, he doesn't think he'd actually be satisfying. 

Michael probably took the longest shower known to man, and when he stepped out he was surprised to find Alex eating out of a box of Krispy Kremes. Alex looked up and grinned and offered Michael a doughnut.

Michael took it suspiciously and bit into it. He ended up sitting next to Alex, closer than he probably should be, talking about nothing.

Their hotel door opened and in stumbled a very hungover Jack in yesterday's clothes crinkled.

Jack took one step into the room and said, "It smells like sex." And then stumbled over to the other bed, and fell asleep.

Michael and Alex awkwardly laughed at him before getting their things packed. Michael noticed Alex had red scratches on his back when he went to change his shirt into a cleaner one.

Michael pointedly looked away and felt a familiar heart crawl up his neck.

When they were back on the road, Michael insisted on sitting in the back with his headphones in.

He made small talk but mostly slept through the drive. 

He woke when they stopped at a gas station, Alex was gently shaking him. His eyes were soft when he looked at Michael. "Want a snack? We've got one more stop to make before we head back, you know."

Michael mumbled out the name of a random candy bar and stayed awake until Alex came back with it. He said his thanks and quietly ate before falling back asleep.

His dreams were plagued by Alex. 

Alex with a wicked grin, Alex with his eyebrows furrowed in concentration, Alex with a blunt moan (not bothering to hide it, letting it leave his mouth how it was), Alex who left Michael trembling with every touch, Alex you left him a panting mess.

Alex who was waking him up again, in his space.

"Hey, you okay? Jack's already inside. You looked like you were having a bad dream. Or. Um. A really good one."

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine." Considering he didn't have a raging hard on.

"Alright, cool. I took our stuff in already, so all that's left is to get you inside."

Michael nodded and went to move- except he spoke too soon.

He totally had a raging boner.

Michael swore underneath his breath and only managed to make Alex look more concerned. "Okay, yeah, fuck, I had a really, really, good dream."

The look of concern that held Alex's face was wiped off and a look of interest replaced it. Alex wiggled his eyebrows before saying, "Yeah? And who was the star of this dream?"

Michael was startled at Alex's blunt interest- although probably not as surprised as he should be- and let out a groan.

Which also surprised him.

Alex placed his hand on Michaels stomach and pushed. "Come on, tell me. I want to be a teenaged girl and tell dirty secrets."

Michael stared at him as his body seemed over sensitive, his skin heating under Alex's palm. Michael's mouth opened- He swears he was going to say real words- but all that came our was a low moan, "Alex."

Alex grinned (no, no, that a definitely a smirk) and said simply, "Michael." His hand moved a centimeter closer to Michael's waistband.

"Oh-"

Alex crowded closer to Michael, if that was possible, and kissed his cheek.

"Come on, we have to get inside."

Michael was pretty sure that it was all a dream, considering the next few days, Alex did nothing to change his thinking.

They reached home without incident, and Michael slept a day or two in.

And then his old routine continued.

He'd go to the little coffee shop, do homework, stare at Alex, leave.

Until Alex cornered him and convinced him to follow Alex to his house that he shared with friends.

Michael should have known something was off when nobody came to greet them.

Alex grabbed Michael by his wrist and lead him to a poster covered room.

And then he was shoved on the bed and Alex sat on his lap, legs on either side.

"You're avoiding me again. Unfair." He whined. 

Michael's eyes were wide from shock.

"Was it because I kissed you? A lot? Because, I'm not going to apologize for that."

Michael sighed and looked away. "Look, if this is some kind of sick joke, I don't want to hear the rest."

"Sick joke? Right, because I'm the one dragging people along." Alex laughed dryly, and paused to breathe. "I like you okay. Like. A lot. I've probably liked you the moment I saw you sitting at that corner table so focused on what you were doing. Okay?"

Michael swallowed. "Yeah. Yeah, okay."

"Okay. I'm going to kiss you now."

"Okay."

And Alex did just that, kissing Michael as softly as he did the first time.

Michael was pretty glad he stopped pining from a distance.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry if the ending was sloppy.
> 
> I think I was out of my league with this one.


End file.
